My life without breastfeeding

My son is nearing his 20^th month and we’re 4 months shy of my 2-year nursing goal.  Now I’m reading up on weaning stories from other moms. I realized, weaning is not easy! You need to be firm in not offering the breast despite the child’s pleading.  Gosh how can i do that when breastfeeding is in our routine? This makes me wonder how to initiate the weaning process. Anyway, I have about four more months to reflect on my weaning strategy. Or maybe I’ll see if he weans naturally? Read more on weaning from Kellymom and La Leche League International.

My life without breastfeeding

My son P is nearing his 20^th month and we’re 4 months shy of my 2-year nursing goal.  Now I’m reading up on weaning stories from other moms. I realized, weaning is not easy! You need to be firm in not offering the breast despite the child's pleading.  Gosh how can i do that when breastfeeding is in our routine? This makes me wonder how to initiate the weaning process. Anyway, I have about four more months to reflect on my weaning strategy. Or maybe I’ll see if he weans naturally? Read more on weaning from Kellymom and La Leche League International.

Talking about weaning makes me think of my mommy life without breastfeeding! Hmmm.. A life without breast pump and breast milk storage?  I’d certainly like that! For me, it’s only  the system of pumping and storing breast milk that complicates my nursing life.

Here are what i look forward to when my son finally weans:

No more office pumping

This i look forward to! I'll definitely do more office stuff. Hehehe.. No more checking the time and rushing when it's time to express milk.

I'd appreciate life without a bulky breast pump and all its parts. My commuting life will be easier once i stop carrying the pump and the cooler bag daily from home to work and work to home. Plus, this means no more cleaning pump parts and bottles! Cleanup is among the stuff i definitely won't miss.

No more breast milk storage

I won't be stressing myself about keeping breast milk safe in storage. I won't be bothered every time brownout strikes. This is a relief!

Hooray for more space in the refrigerator, too. I'll free up the ref space once i pull out those BM containers. I won't be freezing the ice packs, too. That means more space in the freezer and lower electricity consumption. Yehey for that!

No more biting

Now this is a relief, right? My child sometimes bites my nipple when he's sleepy or when he's teething.  It really hurts when he does this.  I definitely won't miss all the pain from biting.

More wardrobe choices

I made it a point to wear breastfeeding friendly clothes. This is a must for easy nursing.  I also look for clothes that allow easy access. I usually wear button-down shirts and  v necks. Wearing such is a must when pumping at work,  definitely gives you privacy and ease as you about your pumping business

Nursing is a  major consideration when i buy clothes, Now i can wear round neck shirts and high-neck blouses. Hooray for more clothing options!

[caption id="attachment_2908" align="aligncenter" width="239"] From the start, my son has been an avid nurser.[/caption]

Missing nursing

Nursing has been a great bonding experience between me and my son.  Till now, we still rely on nursing as a main form of bonding, My favorite part is when we nurse during the night, when everyone else is asleep. It's our own "mom and me" time.

Nursing is my own convenient way to soothe a distressed baby. My toddler is fast approaching the "terrible twos", but sometimes,  nursing still works to calm him. Nursing is my secret weapon! My kid learned to sleep on his own, especially during daytime when i'm out. But often, during the night, he comes to me to nurse to sleep. For me, nothing beats the convenience of side-lying position while nursing. I can lie down while my son drinks his milk.

His first word in the morning is "Dede", even if he's not that hungry and will suck on for only a few minutes. At night his last word is "Dede", too as he cozies himself to sleep.

Breastfeeding became a big part of my life! I truly think it’s among my proudest moments. I  exclusively breastfed for 6 months and we're still nursing till now. I think that's a big achievement. This makes me wonder how i'll get started weaning him.

Uh oh...  Sounds like i'm going to truly miss nursing. I think i need more time to prepare for weaning! It's a two-way street. It's not only my son who needs to be prepared for weaning.  I'll need some conditioning as well.  Weaning is among those stages a child must get through. My kid can't breastfeed forever right?

For more tips about breastfeeding, please read my All About Breastfeeding page.

***

A Year of Office Pumping

I just realized, it's been more than a year since I got back from work! That means i'm a working mama for one year already and I've been a pumping mama for a year now! At first i thought pumping at work was an ordeal but as i progressed, it got easier and pumping became like second nature for me!

I really feel lucky that my job allows me to pump regularly. I know some moms who find it hard to pump while at work so they just forego breastfeeding when they get back to work.  A working mama's line of work can really greatly influence her choice on whether to breastfeed or not. I'm just very thankful that i'm among those who can breastfeed while e lucky ones who can

I think the main difference now that my son's 15-month old is that  i only pump in the office. When my child was less than one, i made it a point to pump or nurse every 3 - 4 hours. For me, that meant bringing the electric pump everywhere so that when baby can't nurse, i'll have to pump.  But now that he's a toddler, i make it a point to directly breastfeed whenever possible.

Here are pumping tips so you can last this long!!!!

Pump as often as you can! 

• If pumping three times is just not possible, then aim for two sessions!  I try to squeeze in a pump every 4 hours when i'm really busy.  When i go beyond 4 hours without nursing or pumping, my breasts feel heavy and full. 


• Frequent but short pumping is better than few but longer sessions. I used to pump for around 15 minutes but now one pumping session lasts 1o minutes. By Philippine law nursing employees should be given a total of a least 40 minutes in an 8-hour work period as lactation break.
  
  
  
  • To save time, i reuse pump parts for the next session, provided it it within the 4-hour window. If it's beyond that, i'll need to wash them. Store in container with ice packs to delay contamination.
  
  
  
  

[caption id="attachment_2106" align="aligncenter" width="300"] I invested in a good double electric breast pump. Using one makes expressing milk shorter and much more comfortable.[/caption]

• Pump where it's more convenient and accessible. By Philippine law still, they should be given lactation stations where they can pump in private and store milk.


• In our office, that lactation station is in the clinic, which is one storey away.    So instead of going there to pump, i just pump in the comfort of my own work station. I just cover up the best i can. I no longer mind than  my breast pump is a bit noisy.   I'm lucky my office mates don't seem to mind, (or at least, they don't show that they mind). While pumping,  i get to answer the phone and work on my computer. Over the few months, i mastered some multitasking skills - expressing and working is one of them!

Except drop in your pumping output

• Don't despair if you get much less than the amount you used to get months before. I used to get around15 to 20 oz of EBM when baby was below 6 months but now i'm getting just around 5 to 10 oz daily.  At one point, i yielded 1 oz after 15 minutes of double pumping.


•  Your production  adjusts to your child's demand, he needs less milk now your production also follows. 

Pump, pump, pump to extend nursing.

•  If you want to sustain your breast milk supply for extended breastfeeding then pumping might be a good idea. Unlike when he was less than one year old, your growing toddler's main source of nutrition is solids. He's also much more mobile and curious and chances are, the only decent nursing you have is during the night! Decreased nursing sessions might signal lower demand for milk. Pumping can help sustain your production for nursing longer.  

In my one-year pumping career, here are the mistakes I STILL MAKE:

Forgetting to refrigerate EBM after getting back from work

• Solution: If you can't put EBM in the fridge right away, assign someone to do so.

Forgetting to freeze ice packs for next day's pumping

• Solution: Have backup ice packs so you always have ice packs ready

Leaving behind small pump parts like valves or screw caps

• Solutions: Count all the parts before leaving the house. Learn hand expression. This can be handy in situations when can't use the electric breast pump.

So there - just some tips to sustain your pumping career! Happy pumping!

Also worth reading:

• Who has time to wash the pump parts?


• More tips for nursing and working mommies


• A working mom's guide on thawing and serving breast milk


• Breast milk storage tips from a working mama 

***

Coming to Terms with Low Milk Supply

Not giving enough breast milk for one’s baby is among the worst nightmares of a new mom!  For a mom who has early on decided to nurse, not producing enough milk is major cause of stress!   My previous guest post is about a mom’s struggle with her milk supply and how she was able to move on.

If you’re among those moms who struggle with very low milk supply, read on for some points to keep in mind.

For moms who just gave birth, these are some ways to start producing breast milk:

Directly breastfeed your newborn as frequently as possible.

During his first weeks, he may need to nurse every three to four hours. If for some reason,  baby can't directly nurse, pump pump pump! This is what happened to us. Baby got held up in the NICU for almost a week so i pumped like there's no tomorrow during the time he spent there.

Consume lots of malunggay products.

They come in the form of capsules, powder, tea, cookies or chips. Malunggay or moringa is a well known milk supply booster.

Eat a lot! I really noticed that when I eat more, I get more milk when pumping at the office. Dieting right away after giving birth may not be advisable for moms who want to breastfeed.

Think twice about supplementing.

Supplement may come in the form of  breast milk donations or formula.  I dare say that supplementing should be a last resort, especially for those with newborns. Direct breast feeding triggers milk production. So if you feed baby through the bottle (with breast milk or formula), you decrease baby’s time at your breast.  During the first weeks, direct nursing prompts your brain to produce more milk.  Also avoid giving pacifiers. All his sucking should be on the breast.

When you feel your supply is not enough

Seek medical advice to check if your milk supply is genuinely not enough. We can’t measure the amount milk your baby drinks when he’s directly breastfed.  So you must look for other telling  signs that he’s getting enough. Among the tell tale signs that your baby is getting enough is he's not gaining enough weight and if he's not regularly passing stools and urine. Consult a breastfeeding-friendly pediatrician for the correct diagnosis. Read here for signs to watch out for when choosing a nursing-friendly doctor.

Be informed!

Do your homework even before D-day. In the Philippines, where formula feeding is the norm, getting sound advice from other moms, or peers or even doctors can be a challenge. In the US, they even have La Leche Leauge hotlines for moms  having trouble with breastfeeding.  Try to get in touch with breastfeeding advocates like Latch and Breastfeeding Philippines.  I've tried emailing Latch once about my nursing issue and they responded so kudos to them! The internet offers a wide variety of breastfeeding sites that are a gold mine of good information about nursing, among the best is Chronicles of a Nursing Mom.

[caption id="attachment_1934" align="aligncenter" width="220"] Even nursing mother dogs need some prodding from caretakers during the first days post partum!                   Source of Photo: austintexas.gov[/caption]

Below are some good suggestions for moms having problems with low milk supply:

Have a nursing goal.

Set your nursing goal early on and assess this goal regularly. Decide until when you want to nurse, until baby’s 6^th month? Or do you have plan to nurse until his toddler years? For moms will ultra low milk supply, being able to nurse until the 6^th month can be quite a feat.  While those with rich supply might not think of weaning until baby’s first year! Really ask yourself if long-term breastfeeding is  for you.  By setting that target, you can manage your expectations.  Most moms will be happy knowing that they've achieve the nursing goal she set.

Avoid comparison.

Never compare your own situation with other nursing moms. Keep in mind that every body is wired differently. Some moms have abundant milk supply, even able to donate milk by the liters. And for some lucky ones, nursing comes naturally. Don't ever dare to pity yourself for not doing so.

Learn to accept

Come to terms your own nursing situation! When you’ve tried virtually everything and that supply still won’t come up, acceptance is the next best step. Be at peace, knowing that you tried your best to breastfeed your child!

Breastfeeding isn't the end-all and be all of being a mom. Nursing is just one of the million or more skills we must master to raise the little one! But it would not hurt if you try to nurse for as long as you possibly can!

Also worth reading:

• How you could be wasting breast milk

***

Nursing my Toddler

Nursing remains our very own bonding session. It gives me much comfort knowing that my "dede" nourishes and soothes my growing toddler. La Leche League discusses the benefits of nursing beyond one year.

But apart from the health benefits extended breastfeeding bring, my very own selfish reason to nurse at this stage is because it's the topnotch way for us to cuddle and connect!  A growing boy like P is always distracted  about learning to talk and walk and in dealing with his emerging social life.  It gives me much satisfaction knowing that he's all eyes on me when he wants to nurse.

However, extended breastfeeding  is not at all a picture of  "mother and child" worthy of a painting.  There's an ugly and frustrating side to breastfeeding a toddler. You'll have to deal with an overactive and distracted child. But just so we're clear, any breastfeeding issue you might have can still be dealt with utmost patience and with the right information.

Here's what i deal with as a milk machine to a one-year old. I also wrote some ways how i deal with such issues.

 

Acrobatic breastfeeding positions

Remember how hard it was to find that perfect latch during baby's first weeks? Well, this won't be as hard when nursing a toddler. He'll know how to place his mouth already. In fact, he has mastered this so much that he'll try sucking in different positions! At one year old, some babies are very mobile they'll try nursing while sitting up, standing or upside down. Name it, P and i might have tried it!  Most of these new positions are just too awkward that it's just not possible to do outside the comfort of our private space.

[caption id="attachment_1775" align="aligncenter" width="300"] Here's our more "decent" nursing picture.[/caption]

As an eager explorer, P has learned to play with my other nipple while nursing. This irks me because he keeps fiddling and pinching my nipple. I guess this relaxes him and helps him go drowsy and sleepy. Again, this twiddling and pinching falls under the awkward category. I've learned to tolerate him.

Pain from biting

At thirteen months, my baby only has three teeth and he's teething right now. He enjoys biting because his gums are itchy. Our nursing session goes like this; he nurse for 5 to 10 minutes then stop. Then he'll bite my nipple. I cringe in pain, sometimes i laugh. I noticed that he would keep on biting if i react, whether i cringe in pain or if i  laugh. I guess he thinks that i like him biting me. He thinks i'm teasing him so he teases me back and biting my nipple!  When he starts biting i take this as a sign that he's done nursing. I stop nursing so he won't be encouraged to bite. He can ask to nurse later.

Asking for "dede"

My baby would touch my breast to indicate that he wants to dede. He does this every time he wants to nurse. When i come home from work, instead of a welcome home kiss, a get some breast frisking from him. Sometimes we would hear an occasional "dede" from him! Yes, my 13-month old can say a few words and "dede" is one of them.

He would also do this breast frisking while we're outside. Sometimes he'll go further by lifting my shirt!  It will help if you will give in right away to avoid a major tantrum. He could be really thirsty for milk, that's why he's asking! I made it a point to cover up to avoid shocked glances from onlookers.

Less breast milk intake and pumping output

A toddler needs more solids for steady weight gain and growth. At this point, he'll need more than milk. That means, we can expect a decrease in the intake of breast milk. I just make sure that i nurse on demand.

Since baby's demand for milk has decreased, expect a decrease in your pumping output as well.  Mine has halved since my pumping heydays during around baby's sixth month.

Shorter (or longer) breastfeeding session

How long a nursing session varies greatly. Sometimes it lasts just 3 to 5 minutes and that leaves me wondering whether he is satisfied at all.  Since he has turned his back on the bottle completely, he makes up for lost nursing time by nursing more at night.

For more information on extended nurse, here's Kellymom's notes.

***

Breastfeeding Beyond 6 Months: Problems and Solutions

I'm glad i was able to pass, with flying colors,  the 6-month exclusive breastfeeding hurdle. And it's been more than 2 months since baby started taking in solid foods.

Honestly, i'm kinda sad about the fact that i'm no longer baby's lone source of nutrition. He's no longer exclusively breastfed and he seems to be delighted by all the new foods he's been tasting! Hayyy... I have mixed emotions about this.

On one hand, i'm glad that he's introduced to solids and he seems to have no adverse reactions so far. On the other hand, the selfish me is tearing up inside as i struggle to breastfeed him some more!

[caption id="attachment_354" align="aligncenter" width="300"] P enjoying frozen fruits in a mesh.[/caption]

According to Unicef, breast milk is best for babies even until 2 years. It's written in the agency's publication entitled  Facts for Life:

 "Breast milk remains an important source of energy, protein and other nutrients such as vitamin A and iron, even when babies begin to consume additional foods after 6 months of age. Breast milk helps protect a child against disease for as long as the child breastfeeds. It is recommended that a mother continue to breastfeed her child up to two years and beyond – as long as she and the child wish to continue. Breastfeeding can comfort a child who is upset and is an important source of nourishment during a child’s illness." 

My husband and I agreed that we'll breastfeed for at least two years. Now, 8 months on, it's getting harder to nurse my son. I keep on thinking, "He seems to be more interested in the outside world than my boobs!"

Here are some of the breastfeeding challenges that  i deal with everyday and some ways to handle them.

Baby’s teething!

My son now bites during our breastfeeding session.  Although he has no teeth yet, it still hurts. I can feel his gums as he bites my nipple and the skin near it.

• When baby does this I ask him to stop and then I unlatch. This way, he'll learn that we can't go on if he continues to bite.  I’m still teaching baby how to stop biting. I expect more hurt from cuts in my nipples as baby has yet to get his pearly whites. But i'm determined to breastfeed even until the time he gets his teeth. I’m keeping my fingers crossed and I hope I get to do this!  Here are more suggestions when baby bites.

Baby’s often distracted.

Since he passed the 6-month mark, I noticed that baby has been more distracted. He's more busy and alert now. He stops breastfeeding for anything.... like  dogs barking, sounds from TV, voices of his lolo or lola. His only decent feeding is during bed time!

I  try to rid him of distractions so he can continue breastfeeding. Here's what i do:

• I dim the lights in our room so he can focus on breastfeeding.


• I close the door to avoid outside noise so he continues feeding


• I turn down the tv or radio volume so he's less distracted

Here are more tips to deal with a distracted baby.

It’s now getting harder to find time for a decent feeding session.

When he was still a newborn, he fed almost every 2 hours. Now i struggle to breastfeed even at 4 hour intervals! Since baby learned to sit upright (with support) and to stand with support. He seemed to be enjoying his new perspectives, he can't stay put and breastfeed for at least 10 minutes!

• I  try to breastfeed at least 6 times per day to ensure that he gets enough milk.  I let him nurse all he want in the morning, before i go to work and at night, when we're about to sleep.


• Just like any prodding mom, i offer him my breast on any chance i get. Sure, i feel hurt when he snobs them. But i still insist and hope that he sucks some more.


• I'm also exploring new breastfeeding positions to keep up with my now semi-mobile son.  I expect that my acrobatic moves will be put to test.

It's getting harder to squeeze in a pumping session while at work.

It's almost 5 months since i got back after my maternity leave and work has been more and more demanding! I was given special treatment as a new working mom. But after 5 months, i'm a less new working mom already. People have been less lenient in the office. More and more deadlines are given to me, like any other ordinary employee. As i  get more busy at work, it's getting harder to squeeze in a pumping session. Read this more for tips for working moms who breastfeed.

Expressing breast milk is important at this stage because baby directly breastfeeds less. Pumping will help maintain your breast milk production so never miss a chance to pump when you can't directly breastfeed.

• When i'm really too busy, i just pump for 10 minutes instead of the usual 15 minutes per session. Frequent short pumping sessions are better than just one long pumping session.


• There are times when i do work outside the office and get back later in the day. I bring an extra manual pump and a cooler bag during these days just in case it's too late and my breasts feel engorged while out of the office. So far, i'm still not able to pump outside the office.


• I squeeze one more pumping session when i get back from work if baby's sleeping.  Eight months on and my mantra's still the same - pump, pump, pump!!!

Since I’m away for about 8 to 10 hours daily, I’m not sure anymore if baby is  dutifully offered breast milk.

My MIL is overly excited to introduce many types of food for baby. I really get paranoid and i hope she delays giving baby meats, eggs and citrus fruits. I  plan to give such foods later, may be in 10 months, so we can reduce risks of an upset stomach. Delaying such food will also allow time to ready baby's stomach for more complex foods.  I've also noticed that his expressed breast milk intake dwindled. From the usual 16 ounces, he just drank  about 10 - 12 ounces while i'm at work!

• What i do to lessen overfeeding of solid baby food is to "ration" his baby food. I just bring out 2 small jars of baby food for baby to consume while i'm away. I put these jars with the 4 baby bottles for his consumption while i'm at work.


• I also give clear instructions that only the food i prepared shall be given to baby. And i pray that these clear instructions are followed by the caregiver, hopefully.

Introduction of complementary food 

This is the main culprit why baby gets less milk.  From the wording itself, baby food is  complementary food! I just want to point out even more, baby food at 6 months is meant to complement breast milk. Kelly Mom says that breast milk should be the main source of nutrition until 1 year.

I'm not undermining the benefits of baby food. Baby food is vital so that he can get nutrients like protein. Introducing  baby food will also ensure that  he'll get used to different tastes and texture of foods.

My pediatrician already warned that baby's breast milk intake will decrease once solid foods are introduced. So here's what i do to ensure he's getting adequate amounts of breast milk:

• I nurse him before i give him solids. This ways he'll be less hungry and be satisfied with just 3 to 4 spoonfuls of solids.


• I limit the amount of  baby food, just 3 to 4 tablespoons per feeding. I serve  solids 3 times a day. I plan to increase to 4 times by 10 months.


• I let him drink 1 ounce of expressed breast milk from the cup after feeding solids. This also serves as his practice sipping from a cup.


• I use breast milk to dilute his baby food, which includes pureed fruits and veggies and infant cereals.


• I also serve frozen breast milk in a mesh feeder. Baby enjoys munching on a feeder because it relieves his itchy gums.

I'm committed to breastfeed until at least two years, so i'm intently researching on ways how i can deal with these struggles.  I really to hope to get through these breastfeeding blunders.

Click here to read about breastfeeding beyond one year!

***